Monday, January 23, 2006

The Thrill is Gone

Dear Spouse,

I'm not sure I like you. I admit that this past week I haven't tried to lose weight or get in shape, but I have been careful, suspiciously eyeing each morsel of food, and imagining each muscle fiber re-flabbing itself while I've been sick this week. I was anxious as I stepped on the scale this morning for our weekly weigh-in. I neither lost nor gained.

You on the other hand. One night you ate two plates of nachos before you went to bed. You drink large, undiluted glasses of juice. You've emptied our secret stash of truffles. All the cashews have disappeared. You had thirds of taco salad.

You lost two pounds.

I don't like you.

4 Comments:

At Tuesday, January 24, 2006 3:07:00 PM, Anonymous lawbrat said...

I dont like him either.

One of my friends, her husband said he wanted to lose a few pounds. 1 month later, down 20 with hardly any effort!!

Ya, no fair.

 
At Tuesday, January 24, 2006 8:11:00 PM, Blogger Sheryle said...

Scum, I say. SCUM!

 
At Tuesday, January 31, 2006 10:07:00 AM, Anonymous JoAnne said...

I think that you should take Dave boating,
With a big, heavy weight that you've been toting.
Place said weight 'round his skinny little neck,
And make sure he's standing on a slippery deck.
Then throw that puppy, oops, what the heck!

 
At Tuesday, January 31, 2006 7:09:00 PM, Blogger Sheryle said...

LOL! JoAnne, I didn't know you were a poet! You made me laugh tonight, thank you. David read it and growled at you. I'm sure you're shaking.

 

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